Food and Family
by The Marauders Quill RP
Summary: MWPP A tale about a late night meeting between Gryffindor and Slytherin in the kitchens.


Marauders Quill is proud to present...**  
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**Food and Family**

The first collab story from the Marauders Quill.**  
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**Members Sirius Black, Marlene McKinnon and Cissy Black.**

**Alternative Summaries:  
1. (Courtesy of Cissy) **The faboo Cissy Black outwits the lame Sirius and Marlene bears witness to it all.  
**2. (Courtesy of Marlene) **Marlene McKinnon, the best witch of her age, sends Narcissa and Sirius to the depths of lameness, while keeping a cool exterior.  
**3. (Courtesy of Sirius)** The - as always - astounding Sirius Black has a conversation with his long-forgotten cousin, Cissy Black, while Marlene Mckinnon is in the way.  
**Real Summary:** (MWPP) A tale about a late night meeting between Gryffindor and Slytherin in the kitchens.

**Disclaimer: **All Harry Potter logos, trademarks, names, characters, and related indicia are the property of Warner Bros., J. K. Rowling, and/or their respective owners. (In other words, we don't own it... Pity. So don't you dare to sue us!) All characters will be returned slightly scratched to JKR when we've finished playing with them.

**AN: No house elves were harmed in the making of this fic. Read on!**

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"Would Mister Black like something to bite?" the tiny House Elf squealed. 

"Yes, Twinky, Mister Black would like that very much," Sirius smiled at the little creature. The Elf scurried off and the Animagus sat down on one of the tables identical to the ones in the Great Hall. He grinned at one of the female Elves.

"Hello, Sally, did you miss me?" he winked.

Sally, dressed neatly in one of the tea-towels, blushed vividly. "Mister Black always haves to tease Sally," she muttered.

"And it's all for you cookies, Sal," Sirius said solemnly.

The Elf smiled brightly. "Sally shall get Mister Black somes!" and she disappeared.  
Sirius leant back, legs dangling in the air. Though he was taller than Peter, he was still one of the smaller boys of the school and took an unknown pleasure (and it would stay that way - he had no desire to be laughed at, thankyouverymuch) from swinging his legs to and fro. He remembered that, when he had been a little boy, he and Regulus would crawl on the big table in the sitting room when their parents were absent, and they would swing and swing their legs until they fell off the furniture.

Sirius frowned. His brother was at school now, two years beneath him, in Slytherin of course. They never spoke to each other, but he had seen his brother conversing with Bellatrix and Narcissa. His scowl deepened. He had never liked the haughty Bella, but he had liked Cissa, as he had called her, for a long time. Maybe not as much as Andromeda, but still an awful lot. But then he had been sorted in Gryffindor, forever insuring the wrath of his family, most of whom pretended every summer he didn't exist. And his brother and cousins, except for Andromeda, had followed the example of their parents.

--- --- ---

Marlene tickled the pear in the hopes that no one was in the kitchen. Except for the house elves. She needed food. As soon as she stepped over the threshold of the painting, at least a dozen little house-elves came scurrying up to her.

"Good evening Miss McKinnon, would she like something to eat?" a house elf piped up from Marlene's waist.

"Oh yes, I have been dying for some apples for ages." The house elves seemed to come back mere seconds after she had asked. Marlene took a closer look at one of the tables, then saw that a human was amongst the elves. She frowned, then decided to get a closer look.

Marlene took an apple from Pinkle the house elf, and sidled up to the person.

Stepping out from the shadows, she finally recognised the person.

"Hi Sirius, you do know that you're sitting at the equivalent of the Slytherin table?"

--- --- ---

The human form gave a yell and jumped up. He looked mortified at the table and moaned as in deep torment.

"Why me? Slytherin table and McKinnon - what did I do to deserve this?" he grunted. Then he Summoned his eau de cologne and started to spray it on himself. "Slytherin smell... bah!" he muttered.

With a tap of his wand he banished the bottle again and after another tap (now against the table), handwriting appeared on the polished surface.

_Slytherin stinks._

"There," Sirius grinned.

--- --- ---

Narcissa sighed heavily as she wound her way up the stairs from the Slytherin dorms. She had heard nothing but chatter from her sister over the upcoming tests over dinner and, although she usually just ignored the rants, it had finally made her lose her appetite. Now regretting the missed dinner, she headed towards the kitchen.

Upon entering she heard voices other than those of the little elves. Elves made such pitiful squeaks and whimpers, but these were the voices of other students. Not wanting anyone to tell Bella she was sneaking into the kitchens (she could just hear her sisters doting, asking her if she was alright, why she felt the need to wander off, if she was planning on gaining too much weight by snacking...) she almost turned around and headed back to the dorm, but then she recognized one voice in particular. That of her cousin, Sirius Black.

If Sirius ever spoke to Bella it was to send a curse her way. They _had_ used to get along, maybe he wouldn't rib her too badly for being in the kitchens. Straightening tall, putting on the Black sense of nobility, Narcissa walked into the kitchen quietly. Relieved to see the other voice belonged to Marlene and not one of Sirius' odd friends, Cissy watched as he made some words appear on a long table. _Slytherin Stinks._

"Really, Sirius. A Black should be more creative than that." Cissy smirked as she turned towards a small elf, cowering at her feet.

"I'd like some toast and tea. Now."

"I actually agree with Bla... er, Narcissa on this. Tsk, tsk," said Marlene thoughtfully as she looked at the words on the table. She took a bite out of her apple, and observed the elf scurry off to obey to Narcissa. Sirius put his wand back up his sleeve and frowned at his cousin.

"Says the most creative one of the family, I'm sure. Plus, you know, saying please to Lonty won't kill you," he said coldly. Then he turned to McKinnon.

"Besides, I don't need to be original. It's true." He nodded importantly and suddenly looked down. His scowl turned into a merry smile as he crouched.

"Sally! You're the goddess of the kitchen," he grinned, taking over the plate filled with huge chocolate cookies and immediately putting one in his mouth. He was going to let no Slytherin distract him from food!

Narcissa had smiled as Marlene agreed with her but resisted sticking her tongue out at Sirius.

"Please? Why would I need to say such a thing to an Elf? Truly Sirius, I sometimes wonder if Auntie dropped you when you were young. All of your ideals..." she paused, disgusted as she watched him jam a large cookie in his mouth. Sighing she sat on a small stool to await her order. Looking up at Marlene, Cissy smiled politely.

"It may be amazing for you to know that Sirius and I used to be very fond of each other. When we were both young and he had yet to be spoiled by his friends. Before he became...so very odd." Narcissa tilted her head to the side, her brow scrunched up, trying to figure out if Sirius would choke on the amount of food he had stuffed into his mouth.

"Wow... that is amazing..." Marlene noted. Seeing Narcissa look oddly at Sirius, she did the same, to see Sirius stuffing his face with cookies. "So very odd..." Marlene felt a bit surprised that she was yet again agreeing with Narcissa, but she actually seemed civil, unlike how she found other Slytherins. Sirius swallowed the huge cookie with some effort.

"You mean I'm odd because I think Elf-heads on the wall are weird decoration?" he said, sarcasm dripping off his voice. "And my mother never touches babies, let alone drop them. She thinks they're hideous." He got to his feet again and smiled down at Sally.

"Thank you so much, Sal, darling. I've no idea how I'd survive without you," he winked. Sally blushed and giggled, but then looked up at Narcissa with an apologetic expression. She made a little bow for the three students and shuffled away. Sirius turned back to Narcissa. "Besides, I didn't hear you deny it!" he said triumphantly, pointing at the table where the words still glistened.

Narcissa rolled her eyes, glancing at where Sirius pointed. "To respond to such childishness is below me. Really dear cousin, what have these Gryffindors done to you?" She looked to Marlene and nodded politely

"No offence." Seeing the small elf approach with her tea, the cup rattling, making an awful clatter, Narcissa gave it a disgusted glance and snatched the cup away.

"What kind of tea service doesn't include milk?" she looked down at the elf, watching him set her plate of toast down. She should have kicked him away for his ignorance but, looking up at Sirius, knowing he and Marlene were watching her, Cissy sighed heavily. "Milk...please?" her voice dripped with sarcasm. Shuddering, she picked up the dry toast and nibbled on the edge.

"I don't see what difference it makes Sirius. That elf, all the elves would get me my milk whether I said please or not. It is their purpose in life for pities sake! And as far as using them for decor, we have a similar display. Mum says it's for remembrance. Not some twisted act. If you took more pride in your own family history, perhaps you would feel differently."

"I suppose they would get you milk if you glare, but I guess that they won't drop your cup by trembling in fear if you're nice to them," Sirius snorted. He hated this. He had said it all to those retarded, arrogant pureblood-fanatics before. Well, yelled it, to be precise. When one's mother drags one off the train, screeching one is the disgrace of the family and she will not have her son talking to muggle scum and traitors' filth, while said scum and filth are watching you (Pete even a bit slack-jawed, if he remembered correctly), it is not possible to keep a reasoned dialogue. Still, he reckoned the almost polite conversation he was having with Narcissa was an improvement over the many shouting matches he had had over the years.

"Besides," he argued on, "I always have been able to praise the truth astutely. Gryffindor has nothing to do with it." He nodded to the writing and a grin broke through on his face. He had written a poem once about his family and had been allowed to recite it before the assembly - of course no one had read it a forehand. He had been chased away after the third verse: Cissa, you make me dizzah/ Bella, the way you look/ Makes me puke. "Good times, good times..." he murmured more to himself than to the others. The repuke afterwards had been horrible, but getting back at Bella (who even had at that time already forseen his "total disrespect for family traditions and values" and treated him with as much contempt as possible) had been priceless.

Narcissa stood quietly contemplating Sirius' words and met the trembling elf half way across the kitchen. It made her stomach turn to even look upon their tiny shriveled bodies so she snatched the milk away and turned about quickly. In passing Marlene, Narcissa snickered.

"I suppose your views on house elf rights reflect that of my dear cousin? Being a Gryffindor and all..." She spoke the house name with disdain and, keeping her back to the both, began to pour some milk into her tea. The small elf walked to her side, asking her if there was anything else she needed.

"If this tea is cold because I had to wait for you to bring the milk..." she trailed off as she sipped the liquid. Swiftly, she pushed the elf away with her foot. "I need nothing else from you." Turning then, her eyes locked with those of her cousin. Cissy smiled sweetly and sat back down, tucking a long strand of her hair behind her ear, picking up some toast. She was beginning to enjoy this little evening chat. Perhaps, if she could warm Sirius up, become close again, he would return to the family.

"Do you hear much about your brother Sirius? You left him so broken hearted when you skedaddled to Potter's house."

Sirius had opened his mouth furiously when he saw his cousin almost kicking poor Rooks out of the way, but now he snapped it closed again, his teeth clicking audibly.

_Below the belt. Way below the belt. Not fair!_

He had always liked Regulus - at least, before he had gone to Hogwarts. The problem with Reg was not that he was a maniac like their father or a menace like their mother, it was that he would believe whatever an authority said. And after Sirius had been away for ten months, their parents' influence had been impossible to erase. Though Reg had often giggled when Sirius had complained about their family - imitating their aunts and uncles had been his favourite - he had believed the pureblood-nonsense that year, because there had been no critical voice to point out the ridiculousness of it all. Sirius had felt confused when he noticed the change at first, then he had been downright angry (certainly the moment Reg - _his _Reg, his little brother - had said flat out Sirius' friends were dirt) and afterwards he had felt guilty. It wasn't Reg's fault. It wasn't his nature to be critical. But Sirius, he felt, should have been there to make sure his brother wasn't being fucked up.

"I didn't skedaddle at all!" he grumbled, feeling his cheeks going red.

Marlene felt the tension in the room, as big as it was, and decided to stay out of this. She saw the house elves looking fearfully from Sirius to Narcissa, then hurrying back to work as they saw Marlene glancing at them. She tried to back into the shadows a bit, and tried to be quiet. When she did speak however, it was more of a murmur.

"Skedaddle is a funny word." But what she was thinking was far different from that. Marlene was confused by this all, though she could probably guess what it was about. And she didn't want to get in the middle of a family argument.

"No?" Narcissa took a sip of her tea and smiled sweetly. "I may be misinformed. I personally haven't had a chance to have a long talk with him. But Bellatrix seems to go out of her way to keep an eye on him. She is such a compassionate sister." She turned to Marlene, who had retreated away from the conversation, and smiled warmly.

"Personally, I think she always wanted a little brother and she is just trying to fill the void Sirius created. But she'll hear none of it." Her eyes moved towards Sirius again, slow and emotional.

"We do so miss you at times Sirius." Cissy tilted her head, lost in the past. She didn't hate Sirius as Bella did. He was family and no matter what family came first. He had just been pushed farther down on her list of importance. It was mostly due to the fact that she couldn't comprehend his judgments and his disgust with his station in life or his family. Clearing her throat, composing herself slightly, Narcissa finished her toast quietly and shoved the plate at an elf passing by. Sirius' face now became pale and he looked at his cousin in disgust.

"Bellatrix is looking after Reg? Bellatrix?" he said unbelievingly, as if he had never heard the name before. "Ms. Death-Eater-to-be? Compassionate?" _Are we talking about the same person?_ His face gradually got its colour back. "I see," he said scathingly, "You and Bella are too young to start the breeding program already, so first the brainwashing, eh?" His hands curled into fists and blood was pounding in his ears. _They shouldn't come near him!_

Cissy narrowed her eyes at the accusations he sent her way.

"Someone needs to be there for him Sirius!" she stood and moved closer to him, feeling her wand tucked in her robes. She didn't want to duel with him, she wanted to keep things civil, but he was leaving her with little choice. "He is YOUR brother. WE shouldn't have to take him under our wing. But FAMILY sticks together, a lesson you have chosen to ignore." Sighing, her shoulders relax slightly, she really didn't want this.

"We all have battles Sirius. I know you were unhappy at home, but you don't see everyone with problems abandoning their family..." She still faced him, close now, searching his eyes for some remainder of Black family pride.

_Oh dear._ Marlene stayed silent, not really wanting to remind the Blacks that she was there, but not wanting to leave for they would see her. Instead she just stayed put, chewing quietly on her apple, watching the events unfold.

Sirius was looking down, wondering for a moment what to say. _Merlin's wiener, I wish James or one of the others was here. _

He sighed, dragging a hand through his hair. "I hope he won't become too messed up," he mumbled. "Luckily you are still around. You're fairly decent." His gray eyes searched his cousin. "And Andromeda will keep an eye on him, I suppose. But I hope he won't join that maniac of a Voldemort."

He lifted his chin. "I did not abandon my family, Cis," he said proudly. "My family exists out of James, Remus, Pete, Evans, Harrison, Alice... and so many others. They are my family. Bellatrix, on the other hand, is not. My mother and my father are NOT part of my family." He paused for a moment. "You and Reg," he said finally, "are not a part of my family anymore."_Merlin-and-everything-dirty, it's hard to say that!_ "I'll see you," he said brusquely, taking his leave. "Till later, McKinnon."

Cissy stood still, watching him walk away, shaking her head in pity. He didn't understand.

"Voldemort wants what is best for us all." she called after him, but he just kept walking.

Slowly she walked over to her now cold cup of tea and, after he had left through the door, threw it to the ground in frustration. Looking over to Marlene she smiled sadly.

"We were such a great family when everyone was younger. I just wish..." she stopped, pausing in her own thoughts. Swiftly she grabbed another elf by the arm and held him still for a moment. After getting over her own revulsion of actually touching such a thing she asked in a controlled voice...

"Would you please bring me some more tea, with milk this time." Her eyes narrowed before releasing the small figure. Standing straight, she called over her shoulder, "Bring it down to my room."

Taking a deep breath she turned to Marlene once more and took a few steps toward her. "What he doesn't realize is that he will always be a Black. He will always be apart of my family, even if he doesn't think I am part of his..." moving toward the door, Cissy spoke quietly.

"Good night Marlene, my apologies that you had to be witness to that display."

Marlene gazed at Cissy's back, and sighed. She looked around the empty kitchen and was thankful, for once, that she was alone.

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**AN: Reviews would be much appreciated! As is peanut butter.  
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